Put down your weapon. Step away...

So much has been happening that has made me reconsider just what I am doing in this world. There is so much violence. Violence is all pervasive in our culture, in our society, and in our world. When did it become okay to show countless murders in movies and rate them PG-13 while a single sex scene with a bit of nudity renders a movie R?! What about videogames? Some people might think that first person shooters are entirely fine for kids to be playing. That might be okay if you're game involves shooting bottles, but by creating human targets it's a short step to shooting real people psychologically.

I began to think about it more in depth as the Israeli-Lebanese conflict escalated. I thought about the effects violence has as I was listening to gangster rap. Listening to the depricating comments and abusive language people so often use both at themselves and others makes me wonder how we got to this place. Why is violence so socially acceptable? Why have people become so desensitized that they think it's okay to throw out Just War theory? Why is it okay to punch your friend as you see a car go by with a different state's plate?

Some people might say I am being too sensitive. They might say I am being ridiculous to point at these things and draw connections between them. The fact remains that everything we do, say, think, affects how we think about the world and how we interact with our environment. When we condone violence in our everyday lives, it makes it easier for us to commit atrocities on foreign soil, and the same could be said in reverse. Yet, we no longer care about the evils committed by our soldiers like Abu Ghraib. Once was enough.

I urge you to rethink what you watch and listen to. I urge you to rethink what games you or your children or friends might play. I urge you to rethink the words you use on a daily basis. I want a world of peace. Peace starts in the heart, not out there. Peace starts with you and with me, and is spread through our compassionate actions.

Friend Survey

I have decided to write a book about friendship. I made this decision based on conversations I had with various people, observations of people, as well as my own experiences. The book is primarily for people who have recently come into the 'real world.' So 20 somethings who find themselves in a strange city with few or no connections. I've sent out a survey to some of my immediate contacts, but if you know of anyone who might be interested in taking the survey and being part of this work (perhaps even getting their friendship story in a book), please drop a line through the comment shoot (or read on for further possibilities).

As I go through the process I will keep people updated. I also intend to maintain some kind of dialogue with those who respond to my survey. Any questions regarding the survey or the project I will by any means entertain. I will not include any contact information in the published work, nor will I include your name. The survey is for informational purposes only.

It is divided into three short parts which will take a total of perhaps 15-20 minutes of your time. Below you will find the first part of the survey:

1. Male or Female:
2. How old are you:
3a. In what city and state do you live?
3b. This is your __hometown __college town __summer experience __job location
4a. Approximately how many acquaintances do you have (in the city where you live)?
__0-10 ___11-25 ___26-50 ___51-75 ___76-100 ___100+

4b. Approximately how many of those acquaintances do you interact with on a weekly basis?

4c. You met them primarily because they are (choose one)
__ co-workers
__ connections through friends
__ involved in same activity groups
__ neighbors
__ members of the same religious organization
__ other (explain)

5a. Approximately how many comrades/associates do you have (in the city where you live)?
___ 0-4 ___5-10 ___11-25 ___ 26-40 ___ 41-60

5b. Approximately how many of those comrades/associates do you interact with on a weekly basis?

5c. You met them primarily because they are (choose one)
__co-workers
__ connections through friends
__ involved in same activity groups
__ neighbors
__ members of the same religious organization
__ other (explain)

6a. Approximately how many friends do you have (in the city where you live)?
___0 ___ 1-5 ___ 6-10 ___ 11-15 ___ 16-20 ___ 21-30 ___ 31-50

6b. How many of those friends do you interact with on a weekly basis?

6c. Of those friends, how many of them are close friends/confidantes?

6d. Please explain when, where, and how you met them.

7a. Have you ever placed a personal ad online? __yes __no
7b. Have you ever used craigslist? ___yes ___no
7c. If so, for what purpose?

7d. Have you ever used meet-up.com? ___yes ___no
7e. If so, for what purpose?

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You may either copy and paste it into the comment section (which does remain anonymous if you so choose) OR you may email your serious response to me at: alexis.tara@gmail.com

I will post the second and third parts of the survey up for you to do at your leisure if anyone chooses to take part in the survey via comment. Otherwise I will email you the second and third portions within 2-3 days of your email.

Thank you so much for your participation!!