A Hobbity Hoy or something else...

Sometime during my first week at work it hit me. This is obviously an in between time. There are all kinds of obligations and requirements I need to meet, so it makes sense that I'd have a job that would allow me to meet these. I like the job (well, the training for the job) and I like the people who work there. They're nice, even if many seem to have opposite political and theological positions.

The more that came out about me to the groups, the more clear it became that this is a resting point for me. A stop on my journey meant to be relatively short lived before making the next jump to whatever I'm meant to do. I really am working a job just so Christian can get through school. Once he has his paper (and possibly a BA from my employer, or at least a few credits) all bets are off. Although, this would likely coincide with a great move anyway. Christian is hinting he wants to move over seas, this appeals to me as I find I generally enjoy being in new places surrounded by new things and conquering new problems. Once things settle down and break into a routine all too similar to a rut, I break and run. It's over. Everything is done.

I took a personality test (or I should say a couple) because a friend's blog sporting his results inspired me. It became clear as I reviewed results that I'm on the relatively right path (they suggest career paths and mine were largely: pastor, public speaker, writer, editor, musician, theologian etc...). So my current incarnation as an Academic Advisor is certainly a spring board and a jumping off point. My "hobbity hoy" or something similar. A "hobbity hoy" according to my great grandmother and my father is "somewhere betwixt a man and a boy." Obviously I'm not talking about a male person but my career, my purpose or path. Apparently it's male. But seeing as I'm not particularly interested in learning how to make rose bushes out of fondant, it might be the correct gender application.

Sigh.

Another thing which is "betwixt" is Christian's job situation. Our finances are still shaky (a recurring theme for many Americans, and indeed people all over the world). I'm not sure when my check will come through (hopefully the end of this week) and our reserves are nearly dry thanks to our car tires being replaced. The pressure to take overtime right now is high, despite the anxiety created by a semester start this week. Needless to say Christian feels guilty even buying milk.

Our church and our new friends are a small source of comfort. Game nights at friends' houses are sooo good after pizza and milk! Our praise/worship band is totally taking off (some how we recruited Christian to playing djembe, and inspired someone to play keys, though that person may change from week to week. Next Sunday we'll also have a bassist!). Hopefully we'll be able to attend a small group session on Thursdays at a bandmate's house.

Things are shaky, but at least they're standing up. We may be wobbly but we're not lying down. It's a small comfort, and also source of anxiety...as if at any time everything could crash down around us. May God provide buttresses all along our path...

HURRAY!

I started at my new job today and I have to say I feel really good. It was nice to have seat time in the manual car (even though the ride wasn't PERFECT to and from work - I may have startled a few people with my accidental antics). It was nice to have introductions to the job which confirmed that yes I can do it and yes it does look like a piece of cake (for me). It was also nice to have introductions to people at the job who seem like we could be friends (always a good sign). And having ample opportunities for advancement doesn't hurt...

Your prayers and positive thoughts have definitely helped! It's so good to know that people are out there wishing us well... and I hope I can return the favor (if not specifically I'll at least send out positive thoughts into the world and general prayers for all those who have been rooting for us).

Now there are just a few more things (like the apartment getting straightened out and Christian getting a job not to mention my acceptance to Fuller... though what should be will be...).

I started A.J. Jacobs' book and have to say even though I've just begun the introduction it already makes me laugh and then immediately switches to an eloquent strand of words the next paragraph. Lovely. I'll keep you abreast as I continue...

Peace and Blessings,

A

The Christian Prerogative

As a child growing up with two ordained ministers as parents, I was exposed to many discussions surrounding the Church. Faith was regularly discussed during dinner. There are many things I gleaned from my parents’ conversations some of which I didn’t come to understand until I was much older. Some things however, have always been clear to me. From the earliest I can remember, I was taught that as Christians we have a few jobs. One of them is to be a steward of the world and everything in it. Another is living your faith. A third, which nicely rounds out this group, is that faith without works is dead. So we’re supposed to take care of the world by living our faith and we live our faith by acting in ways that illustrate the teachings of Jesus. Unfortunately, very few Christians seem to do that. Quite a few people seem to have missed the boat entirely.

Let us examine the central point of Christian belief: Jesus is the Son of God and the path of salvation is through him. There are some who say in order to be a Christian all you need to do is to accept Jesus into your heart, and the rest will follow. This kind of thinking leads to inaction by default. If all you need to do is to accept Jesus as your “Lord and Savior” then you don’t need to change any of your actions. In other words, you say you have accepted Jesus and are a Christian, yet you continue to behave the same way you did BEFORE you became a Christian.

Some groups argue that your actions on Earth have NO bearing whatsoever in Heaven. It is only through God’s grace that you are allowed into Heaven. This again leads to inaction. There is simply no incentive or motivation to realize faith through actions with this belief.

Well perhaps if you never knew Christ and you committed atrocities all your life until your dying day and then suddenly saw the light, God might forgive you. I don’t know. It’s clear that an element of grace is present when we consider the parable of the Prodigal Son or the Workers in the Vineyard. Certainly you’re allowed a few mess ups if you claim Christianity. Jesus and God seem to be rather forgiving when we examine the Gospels. However if you claim to be a Christian and yet willfully go against the Word, are you really a Christian? In my estimation, if you’re not at the very least trying to follow Jesus’ instructions, you do not have the right to claim Christianity (Fortunately I’m not the one waiting at the Gate.).

Christmas Eve and Easter service attendance is not enough to save you. We aren’t saved through a proclamation. We aren’t saved through ritual sacraments, services, or reading the Bible. Salvation does not come through prayer. There is only one path to salvation and that is living like Jesus as best as you can. It means loving people, or rather having compassion for your fellow humans and acting out that compassion daily in specific ways. Living like Jesus requires thinking about everything you do and considering how your actions impact those around you. It means conserving energy and resources. It means spending time on people rather than spending money on things. It means an attitude of gratitude. It means voting for politicians and policies that will facilitate social justice rather than voting for a politician who tows the party line. It means speaking truth to power. So when a corporation does something that is detrimental to the community or to people anywhere you stop supporting them. Instead you support a company that is for people and for community. Following Jesus means acting on behalf of the poor, feeding the hungry, caring for the sick, and imprisoned. So when the truck comes around your neighborhood asking for donations right before Christmas, by golly you donate. You volunteer to stock shelves at the food pantry. There is no piece of scripture that is clearer about how Jesus would act than the Sermon on the Mount and the Beatitudes. The groups of people listed are of utmost importance and should therefore be at the center of our actions in this world. It is through our actions that we are saved. It is not enough to profess faith. It is not enough to stand idly by saying “others are more qualified” or to go to small groups or to join the church band.

It is our obligation as Christians to claim our faith and to save the world, one person at a time – one life at a time. This does not mean altar calls, but rather means life changes. You are literally reborn when you become a Christian because you choose a completely new life. You commit yourself to a life like Jesus’ and renounce your past bad habits. When everything becomes sacred, and there is no separation between the divine and the earthly, and every action is an act of faith and of worship, then we are truly saved.

It is an ongoing process, and the most difficult task set before us. It is tempting to fall into step with popular culture and forget our responsibilities. It is tempting to walk away and ignore Jesus’ words, the yearning of our spirits, the call of God, and the choice we made. This is why the Church exists. It is a place where those trying to follow Jesus’ path are able to nurture and support one another in their journey. It is a faith bound in community and communal action, so it makes sense that we come together weekly to check up on each other, at the very least, if not see each other several times a week (or even daily).

Don’t lose hope. Though the Church is sickly, it is remains a testament to Faith’s endurance. We remain. We are here to help each other, following the Way, the Path to Salvation. Our less than perfect attempts get us there nonetheless as we have only ever sought the journey.

Thank GOD we are allowed to walk with HIM.

Inundated: Issues & Thoughts

1. First and foremost, we got a refrigerator. WOOT WOOT!! So we finally have milk and eggs among other exciting things (like fresh produce) which has definitely added excitement and variety to our diet.
2. This past week we had an onslaught (comparatively speaking) in our social calendar. So I met a bassist for possible music projects, made a friend through a friend and actually went out on Saturday night. Then of course we had our typical Sunday thing (with church involving bloody metaphors... guest speakers leave much to be desired, but sometimes can't be helped) involving church and lunch afterward.
3. I'm practicing guitar like I said I would, and somehow I dragged Christian into music too, because the church had a djembe no one played and so now he is practicing drumming. We have a church band practice scheduled Wednesday early evening. WOOT WOOT! The excitement just never ends...
4. I am applying to Fuller. Oy. I hate application processes, and of course it causes you to unearth loose ends, such as the fact that UCSB charged me tuition for this quarter even though I graduated last June. That means I couldn't order a transcript... needless to say I cleared that up, but it still doesn't help the fact that my diploma is being sent to my parents' old address (which who knows if it will be forwarded or what!).
5. I still don't have my absentee ballot. Christian got his. Thankfully he was able to vote. Hopefully mine will go to one of the possible addresses and then get forwarded on to me in Phoenix. I know CA will go to my preferred candidate, the issue is more that I just wanted to vote. It's an exciting year. It's an important election. I want to be a part of it, and who wouldn't? It bothers me that so many people aren't allowed to vote... like felons. Why shouldn't they be allowed to vote? The possibility of not being able to this round is upsetting to me, and it makes me wonder why they should receive second-class citizenship. Jesus gave people who had made mistakes the time of day, shouldn't we?
6. Christian applied for jobs and I had an interview this weekend. I have another one this coming weekend. Cross your fingers that something wonderful will happen.
   
7. I'm freaking out about my instruments. It's so dry here the wood/finishes are under pressure. Humidifiers? A bowl of water? What should I do to remedy this situation? I'm going to the guitar shop today to buy something for inside my guitar case, but the harp is just out...
8. Prayers and well wishes are still encouraged and well received. So far they seem to have made a HUGE difference (the frig is a case in point).
   
9. I'm reading Genome: The Autobiography of a Species in 23 Chapters by Matt Ridley. It's an interesting read with all kinds of points of thought and theories about genetics, humanity, science, history etc that I had not previously considered. After that it's A Year of Living Biblically with some Harry Potter mindlessness in between.
10. The weather has gotten cool enough that a sheet is useful in sleeping. Finally!

I hope everything wherever you are is looking up, despite the crashing global economy and all that comes with it. Remember, tomorrow is another day, and with it comes the possibilities of wonderful change, adventures, and beauty. Thank GOD!!!

Because I HAVE to...

These are courtesy of a fabulous thread on FARK:

The Sensible Social Movement

Protesters anger me. I say this, while feeling simultaneously that some protest is necessary. This is a generalization, but it's true.

I don't like random people on the street talking to me. In fact, I'd rather they not come up and talk to me at all. If you're going to talk to me about cruelty to animals, I think you should consider talking about cruelty to humans (the ones down the block, in this city, country, and world).

Don't hand me any little pieces of paper. I will throw them away. The environmentalist in you SHOULD KNOW THAT.

Social movements these days are often spearheaded by a single major organization (or sometimes a group of organizations), most of which are non-profits. I'm not saying I'm anti-non-profit. But these guys are mostly to blame. Sorry people, but once you let the cat out of the bag, it's over. Once you start, that is, you are responsible for the actions of your adherents. Their actions reflect back on you.

Some of the weird campaigns are begun in the sponsoring organization (say, PETA for example) but many come out of fringe groups of individuals loosely associated (if at all) with the central sponsoring entity. What does this mean? It means you've got a bunch of wackos running around making your cause look like it's for nutters. And you're letting them do that to you.

Control.

Mitigate.

This is the NAME of the GAME.

There are strategies and tactics organizations can use to insure there is a separation between individuals closely associated with you, and those who are the nut jobs. This involves providing clear training sanctioned at a head quarters, focus protest groups, organizers trained at the head quarters, among other things which are time-proven tried and true avenues to effecting change.

These groups who "say" they want changes to occur but aren't employing these time-tested methods don't actually want change. They want the status quo. They want their organization to continue as it's been, and frankly they're wasting your money, time, and energy. If you want things to change, then either join the board of that non-profit and force them to change, or come up with a more effective team (and I will help you do it, because I revamp, brainstorm, and start up well).

Be sensible. Be smart. And if you want to keep on keeping on, do NOT talk to me on the street. I may punch you. Or ask for your name and address.... no telling what I'll send you in the mail. :-D

Art/Design: Multi-purpose Table

We looked everywhere for a table that would fit in our apartment and serve all our needs (somewhere taller than a coffee table, but smaller than a typical kitchen table). We finally decided to make our own table which is finally finished and in our living/dining area. These are the following stages (each of which could have worked on their own, but only the last really works with our interior).

Once we assembled all our materials, Christian put together the table, with a little sanding help from me. Next came painting, which I chose to do in three layers.


This is the first layer (mostly complete except for the top corner). I used acrylics (because I didn't feel like dealing with disposal issues associated with oils). Several different reds (alizarin, cadmium, and brick), blues (medium, ultramarine, deep), and a burnt sienna.

I wanted to get a playful undercoat that picked up on the reds in our house and tied the cooler subsequent coats to this theme of red (and now green as you can see in later layers).




This is the second layer, which is loosely based on Indian floral motifs (often found on semis) depicting versions of the four seasons (Counter clockwise from upper left-hand corner Spring, Summer, Fall, and Winter). Between the central flower/Sun and the seasons on the left is a cloud and rain, on the right, a fire/flower. Colors used were burnt sienna, yellow ocher, white, and cadmium deep yellow.

Obviously this type of design can only work in certain decor situations (a hippy-funky-60s-retro type, an ethnic themed vibrant colored indoor situation, a bright and lush ethnic garden, or a bohemian drug induced eco house). Needless to say, this wouldn't really fly in our place. So what to do?!


We bought a can of satin finish leaf green and I sprayed randomly across the top, and thoroughly coated the legs. Then I took forest green, ultramarine blue, cadmium medium yellow, and a dash of white to mix a variety of greens to accent and pattern the spray. I tried to incorporate some of the earlier layers into the accented patterns.

Christian then coated the whole table with with 3 coats of clear poly to insure the condensation from our drinks wouldn't screw up the paint (among other things) and VIOLA!!!! We have a unique and beautiful table fit for our living space.

You'll notice the earlier layers really allow for the top pattern to come together (and add some nice surprises for the viewer upon closer examination).

Note: If you know anyone who is interested in decorative arts, or would like to commission a piece, I am for hire. I can design an unfinished piece of assembled furniture or a finished piece of furniture, in addition to wall murals etc. Just let me come and see the room where it will be located, and give me any specifics (such as palette or content, surreal through abstract) and we'll discuss price.

Under and Over: A Prayer Request

This past week Christian got over his flu, and transferred it to me. Needless to say, we've been taking turns being holed up in our less than ideal apartment stewing in our own diseased filth. Yummy.

It put a little bit of a wrench in our job hunting, in addition to other external factors. I applied to a few colleges in a variety of positions and two have gotten back to me. One of them expressed interest, but I was unable to get a hold of them to schedule an interview (after they requested one). The other wanted to pursue me but then the next day sent me another email saying, "Oops. We found someone for the job. We'll keep your resume on file because the law requires us to." Nice.

Christian hasn't been having much luck either. He got stuck on working security for whatever reason, however he has a goatee. Apparently goatees don't provide the right image for most security sites - they require you to shave. Neither Christian or I like him without a beard. Chatting today, we thought it might be better for him to do computer repair work. Even if he was working at a lower hourly rate (80 is typical, 40 is what he normally charges) he'd be doing better, working less time, than he would at a security job. We'll see if I can't convince him to post something around the 'hood. There's also an internet cafe opening less than 5 minutes drive from our house. That would also be an easy thing for him.

The main problem is that AZ has been so hard hit with this financial crisis. Lots of people have lost jobs, or aren't making enough money to make ends meet so they're taking up another job, or they're being pushed jobless into the market. This flood of highly qualified people with years of experience isn't exactly good for people like Christian and me.

It's really taken a toll on our overall morale. I may have started finding homes for different items in our apartment, but frankly we're worried whether or not we'll be able to stay here. Christian is worried about even being able to attend school, the whole reason for us moving out here.

I wrote to Cambridge Drive (a wonderful group of people, and if you're in the SB area you should definitely check them out) telling them our woes. In a day's time I had gotten responses telling me stories of their early married years and assuring us they'd pray for us. Which is actually why I'm writing this here, I'd like you to pray for us too. I believe in the power of prayer. I know it works. I know positive thinking works, but if you increase it exponentially, it's power increases by the same fold. A small measure of security (no pun intended) would probably be all we needed to see us through this less than stellar time.

My plan is to call/email/harass employers I've sent materials to, as well as call all the temp agencies in town. I figure, even if it's just temporary, it will still be more income then we have now. Maybe it will give me a chance to work on my book (grin).

Blessings to you and yours.
May God's peace wash over you, and God's love carry you in your times of trial.
May you find the support you need exactly when you need it.
May any suffering or trial you experience be an avenue to strengthen and grow your spirit.

Amen.

God Hit Me Over the Head With a Guitar.

It seems like this is all one big test. I was thinking about it this morning lying in bed with our little black fan moving the hot bedroom air out (hopefully providing some relief from 90 + temperatures). I don't know if you've seen that show, Joan of Arcadia, but I feel a bit like Joan. Basically I'm coasting from one set of instructions to another, however it seems to be revealed. Some people might think I'm crazy (Bill Mahr for one) but it's only because they don't understand.

You see, my spiritual journey started rather young. When my mother was in her third trimester pregnant with me, she was ordained. By the age of four I was standing on dining room chairs "preaching to my people." By 7 I felt like I could "hug" God, and I started having conversations with, or monologues to God. Sometimes I addressed Jesus. I think it was more depending on how I felt at the time. I was baptized when I was 9, on Palm Sunday. I would have been baptized at 7 if I could have, but my father didn't think I was ready.

During junior high and high school I tried very hard to distance myself from the church, which is what led me to Bard College, the overall spiritually darkest time of my short life. There was a generally hopelessness on campus. For those people who have high EQs, it is toxic. Some places retain the emotional content of things that occurred in that location. It was like this at Bard. You could feel all the lost and tortured people - one of the dorms had been an insane asylum, another had terrible suicide stories associated with it. The woods were associated with rapists and murderers (or so the stories went). But even before I heard the stories, it felt dark. It felt oppressive. There were times there where it felt like I sat on the fence between light and dark, moments of unimaginable peace and others of deep despair. Somehow I knew I had to leave. I knew I had to go back to church.

I went on a mission trip the summer after my sophomore year to Costa Rica, Nicaragua, and Panama. While I was there I had deja vu regularly and often times knew things before they happened. Some people may chalk this up to "hooby-dooby shit." The thing is, I'm not a new agie kind of person. I'm firmly grounded. I wouldn't say it if it wasn't true. I swear to God about that. It was during that time I realized I was at a crossroads. Other people on the trip had visions about my choices, about what I should be doing. It became clearer and clearer that there was a major choice here. I could return to Bard or I could take a leave of absence and follow what I thought God was telling me I needed to do. I chose the latter.

I've always been asked whether or not I wanted to be a pastor. It's been the on-going question. When I started speaking, teaching, and leading workshops, more people began to ask that question. Over time it has become more and more persistent. In the past five years I've had more dreams, more deja vu, more directions. Like I said, I just follow where it seems I'm supposed to go (I even had a dream showing me that I should marry my husband).

Even Phoenix was a set of directions. I tried a couple of other paths that I thought should work, but it seemed they just weren't meant to be. You see, either everything falls into place for me and it is clear I should be doing something OR nothing does, and it's clear I shouldn't go in that direction. Moving to Phoenix mostly fell together. Now it just seems like a test. Either that, or I haven't been as true to my directions as I thought.

Fuller Seminary has an "outpost" here in Phoenix. When we were getting ready to move, I was finally resigning myself to the possibility of becoming a pastor. I wasn't sure what was available in Phoenix, but I thought I might be able to do some distance learning while Christian was doing his MMI thing. For some reason Fuller kept popping into my head. I looked at their website, and low and behold, they are here. Strange. Oh, and by the way, you can start during their Winter term (January 2009). I haven't finished the application because frankly I'm worried about being able to pay for that, rent (and basic necessities), as well as Christian's schooling.

I was worried about finding a church out here - so often church searching takes forever. Many times people never find a place that fits. But we were here a short time before the pastor of a church we really liked went and contacted US! If that's not divine intervention... I don't know what is.

How does this relate back to Joan? Well, in one of the episodes God asks her to take up guitar. I'm pretty much in that spot. I've always shied away from it because of my father's ridiculous skills. I never felt like I could quite measure up. That said, I have a beautiful little guitar made by a small furniture maker turned luthier. It sounds goregous (it's not a Lowden, but it's lovely). At lunch this past Sunday that same pastor asked me if I played any instruments. Meanwhile I've been posting on Craigslist that I was looking to join a band. The first serious offer I get loves my voice, and they really want some guitar. Seems it's time I finally learned to play.

We can't know how our actions will effect the lives around us. We just listen for God's voice everywhere and follow, trusting it is all done to bring about the Kingdom.